My life is looking up.  I have good, trustworthy friends.  I no longer think of the pain and suffering I had in the past.  I hold my head up high and take life as it comes to me.  I have no suicide thoughts and for once I believe in me.  I overcame the trials in my way and now have a different look at life, or so I thought.  I am 16 years old and love life.  I find myself looking back at all the pain and drama I had with my past loves.  I didn’t know how to handle it back then and I took the easy way out.  I ran from my problems.  That is, until I met Kristina.  She knew me right from the start.  She was determined to help.  That she did.  I have a flirting problem where I don’ know I am flirting ‘til it’s too late.  I flirt with all my co-workers and it is all very innocent.  I have a boyfriend that I love to death.  I would never cheat on him.

John and I have our fights, but for the most part I thought we were having fun together.  Well, he didn’t see it as I did.  He knew I had a hard time taking rejection.  So he tried to lay it on me soft.  “I’m sorry, but it’s just not working out between us.”  That only made it worse.  He ended all we had.  I get jealous when I hear him talk about other girls in his life and we now can’t even talk to each other without fighting.  Kris always tells me, “You hold your head high and just be yourself.  Don’t let it get you down.” 

So I started going out with a new guy.  One night when he and I were on a date, I spotted John.  When he saw me hanging out with my new boyfriend, jealousy overtook him and suddenly the punches flew.  I cried and tried to hold them back,  still holding on to what Kris told me earlier – “hold your head high…”.  

I finally got help in stopping the fight.  John turned to me and said, “You ho!  I can’t believe I ever loved you!”  That pissed off my new man, and he started in on him again.

 “STOP!” I yelled.  But they ignored me.  Once the second round ended, I gave them everything I felt on the inside.  I turned to John and ripped him a new one.  “Who in the hell do you think you are throwing a fit like a little child?  You don’t want me, but no one else can have me?  I am not some toy that can be dropped and picked back up every time you feel lonely.”  Turning slowly to my new boyfriend, I said, “And you, what the hell do you think you are doing causing a scene like this?  All I have to say is SCREW BOTH OF YOU!” 

Afterwards I felt stupid and embarrassed.  So, I did what I always do.  I ran away. I went home and attempted suicide one more time.  I slit my wrist and cried myself to sleep.  All I wanted to do was overcome it all.